Good for the Soul


My mother used to quote John Lennon when he said, "Life is what happens while you're busy making plans".  This has been a week of life just happening.  Sometimes, in it's spontaneity, it's a beautiful thing and other times it's...an unexpected opportunity for growth.  Earlier in the week I received an email from a beautiful woman I know from college.  She is coming up on a "5" birthday and was feeling a bit unnerved about it.  She sent an SOS out to all of the women she knows to send words of wisdom or advice for her for the upcoming birthday.  What transpired was an amazing thing.  All of the women on the list were part of a thread of emails and stories that instantly made us all intimate strangers.  It felt like being a part of a sisterhood or community of women though I didn't know but a couple of the women on the list.  I started to look into how "community" actually was defined and found some interesting things.  I liked the definition as a cohesive group because of a "unity of will".  That unity of will just happened to be the uplifting of a beautiful sister in a brief moment of crisis, but what will endure is that every woman on the list ended up being uplifted in our own unique way by feeling a profound and deep connection to the human race around us.  We are all so connected by the very thinnest of threads and it is so easy to forget that sometimes.  It was an appreciated moment in my week.     

The other happening, and flip side of the connection coin, was that I received word that a friend of mine from high school died unexpectedly.  It was a great shock, needless to say, and I went to the funeral on Saturday.  It was such a sad event and I felt terrible for being so unplugged from him for as long as I had because I felt so connected to him in high school.  We spoke the same language.  There was a group of friends that I had not seen in 20 years there and we all ended up going out for a drink after the service.  It was one of those surreal moments, almost an out of body experience, where I was watching myself sitting amongst people that I had spent, what seemed back in the day, like a lifetime together but hadn't seen since then.  I felt like I did in high school sitting at that table.  Like I was in a foreign land and I did not know the language or customs of that land, that I would not ever know how to navigate that path.  I will never have hair that looks like that, or be a size 4 and 5'5", or be a cheerleader, or date the captain of the football team.  I also will never be the stay at home mom, or live in the same neighborhood I grew up in, or send my kids to school with teachers that graduated with me, or see the exact same people every single day that I have seen all of my life.  And then I had the epiphany that I wish I had been privy to twenty years ago.  It doesn't have to be my land because I have a land of my own.  My path is my very own, unique path for me that was divinely designed just for me and no one else and I love it.  Much the same way all of those old friends love the path of theirs.  It just always feels so awkward in those times.  The comfort is wherever you find it and mine is not right or wrong, just different.  It takes so long to be comfortable in our own skin.  Such an obvious answer.  Why the hell did it take so long to get there?  As evolved as I pride myself on being, sometimes I am really slow.

After all of the crazy and emotional events of the week, I made a vat of vegetable soup and we had soup and grilled cheese for lunch today (pictured above).  A balm for the soul this weekend for sure.  It was fabulous and just what the doctor ordered.  Thanksgiving is in two weeks.  Don't stroke out, I know it's really soon.  I just KNOW Mother Nature is going to get herself together and cooperate with some cold weather for us.  It will help.  Christmas trees are around the corner.  I can't wait.   

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2 comments

  1. JB - this is such a profound post for me because I can relate to both stories. It's amazing where our paths lead us and how we can't help but compare our lives to those we felt so connected to at such a monumental time in life. But you are absolutely 100% correct that all of our paths are sketched out just for us and once we realize it's ok for ours to be "different", it opens up a whole new world for us. And quite honestly, I love that we are all on different roads intersecting every so often b/c it makes us more appreciative when we bump into each other again. Love, love, love this post!

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  2. Cat- thanks lady! I appreciate the blog love. It is a powerful thing to finally own who you are:) I also love seeing everyone at different times in our lives. Perspective is reality and a great reality check for how far we all have come!! Hope you are well. If you are going to be in town for the hoidays at all, message me on FB and let's get together!! XOXO-JB

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